40 Useless Facts Everyone Should Know

Last week’s response to our donut post was exceptional and thank you for all your messages. This week, for a fall Friday when the weather is just about ready to turn cool for the rest of the year, I decided to give you some useless facts that I found on the Internet. It won’t be life-changing, but feel free to enjoy. If nothing else, some of these will help you sound really smart at any football tailgating parties you do.

Here are 40 useless facts that everyone should know. There will be NO quiz on these later:

  1. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world’s nuclear weapons combined.
  2. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. (This never happened back when we used feather quills on parchment.)
  3. On average people fear spiders more than they do death. (Especially that big hairy thing behind my dryer that pops out when I change loads. Yikes!)
  4. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married. (And 99 percent of that 35 percent are probably dudes.)
  5. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older. (In a related story, 1,999,999,999 out of every two billion that don’t live that long are, have been, or will be married. Coincidence?) 
  6. It’s possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs. (Which explains why the phrase “You can lead a cow upstairs ….” never caught on like leading a horse to water.)
  7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men. (Research has shown that dumbfounded wives blink at five times the rate of their husbands after he has done something idiotic.)
  8. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building. (In other news, there’s probably no truth to the rumor that you can enroll in the IU School of Engineering for $1.99 per credit hour.)
  9. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out. (Which is only a problem for adolescent crocs when their parents ask them to do chores.) 
  10. Ping Pong balls have been known to travel off the paddle at speeds up to 160 km/hr.
  11. The electric chair was invented by a dentist. (I’m thinking he didn’t have many repeat patients.)
  12. In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes. (This amazes every modern woman who has tried to pluck her boyfriend’s bushy eyebrows at some point and has fallen to the floor laughing due to his screaming like a toddler.)
  13. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. (Just wait until we come up with a definition of the word, QWERTYUIOP.)
  14. “Go.” is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. (However, scientists found that virtually every woman on the planet just has to give her significant other, “The Look” and they don’t even have to use the word, go. It’s pretty much understood.)
  15. Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously. (Be careful next time you visit Grandma during the holidays. I’m just sayin’ ….)
  16. Honey is the only natural food that is made without destroying any kind of life. What about milk you say?
  17. A cow has to eat grass to produce milk and grass is living. There you go …
  18. A snail can sleep for three years.
  19. No word in the English language rhymes with “MONTH”.
  20. Cephalacaudal recapitulation is the reason our extremities develop faster than the rest of us. (I’m not sure what this is, but I’m ready to kick your butt in our next game of Scrabble®, Grandma!  Hey … is that nutmeg I smell?)
  21. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
  22. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
  23. Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day. (Don’t look at me … I can only do a couple of pieces these days.)
  24. The “pound” key on your keyboard (#) is called an octotroph. (Freak Millennials out by saying “Octotroph” instead of “Hashtag” the next time you’re being hip. Such as, “Octotroph BlowingMyMind!”)
  25. The only domestic animal not mentioned in the Bible is the cat.
  26. The “dot” over the letter “i” is called a tittle.  (Yep … I had to read that twice just to make sure it wasn’t what I thought it was at first … Lol)
  27. Spiral staircases in medieval castles run clockwise. This is because all knights used to be right-handed. When the intruding army would climb the stairs they would not be able to use their right hand which was holding the sword because of the difficulties of climbing the stairs. Left-handed knights would have had no troubles, except left-handed people could never become knights because it was assumed that they were descendants of the devil.  (My ex-wife is left-handed. Octotroph IKnewThereWasSomethingEvilAboutHer)
  28. A cat’s jaw cannot move sideways. (Probably why they got left out of the Bible.)
  29. The slogan on New Hampshire license plates is “Live Free or Die.” These license plates are manufactured by prisoners in the state prison in Concord.
  30. Chinese Crested dogs can get acne. (Puppy Clearasil is probably big in China.)
  31. Hydrogen gas is the least dense substance in the world, at 0.08988g/cc.
  32. There is debate on what is the densest substance in the world. Some say hydrogen solid is the most dense substance in the world, at 70.6g/cc, while others will say it is Osmium, which has a density of 22.61 g/cm3.  (I can confirm that the densest thing in the world is my brother-in-law, Wayne.)
  33. The house fly hums in the middle octave key of F. (No word on how lovely its’ singing voice is, however.)
  34. The giant red star Betelgeuse has a diameter larger than that of the Earth’s orbit around the sun. (Fun Fact: Say the red star’s name three times and Michael Keaton will appear in your living room.)
  35. The longest name of a place still in use is a hill in New Zealand: Taumatawhakatangihangaoauauotameteaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu—(that’s 92 letters. I counted so you wouldn’t have to. Obviously, mail envelopes in NZ are freaking HUGE!)
  36. According to Einstein’s Special Theory of Relativity, it is possible to go slower than light and faster than light, but it is impossible to go the speed of light. Also, there is a particle called tachyon, which is supposed to go faster than light. This means if you fire a tachyon beam, it travels before you fire it. Octotroph BlowingMyMindAgain
  37. Hummingbirds are the only animals that can fly backwards.
  38. If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it. Unless it’s a Monday, of course!)
  39. If you passed gas consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (They’ve obviously never met my brother-in-law Wayne after eating pork and beans, because my sister says he can do that in one night. Usually under the covers.)
  40. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet. (So, basically, Monty Python and Quentin Tarantino got it right.) 

Have a great weekend everyone and keep laughing!

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